(via unclefather)
My grandma just told me that when I was around 5 years old I wished on a shooting star to meet donkey kong
(via yeah-yeah-beebiss-1)
when you drive your chevy to the levee but the levee is dry and you see the good old boys drinking whiskey and rye
(via tumboner)
“There was nothing poetic in the way we died, there was nothing beautiful in the way you left. It was only tragic.”— our tragic ends.//t.c
(via upinbed)
Ted Cruz isnt laying eggs anymore and hes a losing all his feathers more than normal I’m worried hes sick
Please be more clear that that’s a funny name you gave your chicken
(via yeah-yeah-beebiss-1)
(via yeah-yeah-beebiss-1)
Me, when I buy 24 roombas and an amazon alexa
Me: Alexa, unleash the roombas
*24 roombas emerge slowly from under my bed, consuming everything in their path*
(via kennys-fried-chicken)
romeo & juliet (hobo johnson) // twin sized mattress (the front bottoms)